Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Food Porn PSA

I had an interesting conversation the other day with a friend of mine about television. We were talking about our favorite Food Network shows (real men have favorite Food Network shows, and they do not include anything including Rachael Ray, that saucy minx) when he threw out the term food porn. I'd never heard of it, but I immediately assumed that FN had gotten desperate and were featuring some all-out gravyfest replete with cucumber fellatio and Kegel exercises with carrots or parsnips or something.

Boy, was I wrong. And apparently disturbed, but I'm pretty sure the look I got was because my friend didn't know what fellatio meant. Apparently I was the only person who eats food in the world who didn't know what food porn is, so I went to the most credible source on the planet: Wikipedia.

According to the peerless (and flawless) online encyclopedia, food porn refers to any number of things, including:

*Secondary enjoyment of cooking - not actually cooking, but rather watching others cook (e.g. on FN). Go figure, I was already on my way to becoming a food porn star.

*Blogging - it seems that this very medium has popularized this phenomenon and online foodie coalitions have a major hard-on about it. This post, then, has just been catapulted into a sort of postmodern, eminently self-referential corollary to all other criticisms of food, porn, food porn, and the Information Superhighway.

*Real Porno - I totally called that one. And I'm pretty sure that was a mature summer squash featured in Requiem for a Dream (if you caught that reference I'll buy you a beer).

So, the upshot of all that is twofold: food is delicious, and keep an eye on your vagina around fresh produce. And if your bits and bobs aren't particularly yonic, then you are a man and probably not eating vegetables anyway.

2 comments:

Bryan said...

Why I love Drew: he used the following terms, all in the same post:

Rachel Ray, Kegel exercises, fellatio, hard-on, and yonic. And gravyfest. On a food blog.

Did you guys know he once stuffed and roasted a pigs head? JL and I are going to do that. I just ordered this book from amazon to assist: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060585366/

Just to reiterate. I love Drew. If we had more than 5 readers, I'd put up a poll asking who thought he should move to the vacant space in RWIP house.

miss casual said...

i second his moving into RWIP. if only for the fact that id get fed more often probably.

also he referenced requiem for a dream in relation to food which is exciting and not just a little bit scary.